I woke up happy and optimistic today, the sun was out and it made my room warm. After all this Winter weather I was happy to finally see some sun!
So I decided to edit some pictures, draft some entries and maybe go to the waterfront or somewhere to walk around with my husband and enjoy the sun.
Well he calls a little bit after I’m done editing and drafting to tell me that Kay called him about the bill he missed a payment on, and that if he didnt pay it by Monday then they’d send his name to collections.
Last night I was feeling like challenging myself and trying to see if I could kick my OCD as far as touching things in my room that werent “clean”. For example, my makeup in my makeup drawer. I hate that things I thought were once clean, suddenly arent and I’m extremely hesitant to touch them. Hello I’ve touched them before, what makes now so damn different?! Argh.
But once I got that phone call, my anxiety went up and so did my OCD. As far as today is concerned, any hope I had of trying to kick my OCD I can kiss goodbye.
I need to manage this somehow. I know what’s causing it and I know the source of the problem is difficult to solve at the moment, but I cant keep acting like this. It’s not going to help the situation, its just going to help the stress drive me more insane 
.